Finding Your Willpower

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I've been reflecting lately on willpower.

How do I find it? How do I keep it?

Willpower, when I can find it, feels like magic. It fuels my passion. It makes me feel like a badass and gives me the motivation to accomplish things I never thought possible.

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But when I am lacking willpower, I am hard on myself.

  • Why didn't I work harder during my workout? I could have kept going!

  • Why did I have that extra glass of wine and dessert last night? Ugh, I have no self control!

  • Why did I respond right away to that text message? I shouldn't have said anything.

  • Why did I agree to plans I knew I wouldn't want to keep? I should just say no!

I'm working on finding grace in these moments, and also focusing on what's working -- when I feel strong and determined, connected to my willpower.

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So, how do we practice willpower? I asked around for ideas and got some stellar advice for tapping into your inner strength. Next time you're struggling to find your willpower, try these tips.

Go Within

  • "Focus on your goal and consistently concentrate on progress, no matter how small."

  • "Practice self care first."

  • "The self-discipline aspect of life is NOT easy. But I think what gets me motivated is knowing I will always feel better after or in the long run if I push through."

  • "Get aligned first. Do your meditation. Do your workout."

  • "I remember all the tough stuff I've been through, and that gives me the willpower to keep going."

  • "I have a word that I've always repeated to myself when I'm racing or want to up my game in lifting. It's a word that I want to be, that encourages me: strong."

  • "Unlock those internal vibrations that you have inside of you that tell you that anything is possible. Connect with others who know that."

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Surround Yourself with Support

  • "Surround yourself with others who are as passionate and fired up as you are."

  • “When things get tough, I turn to peers and friends for support, especially those who have been through similar struggles. I try my best to keep a very forgiving yet forward attitude with myself.”

  • "Set goals and tell someone about them so that you can be held accountable."

  • “Don’t try to do it alone. Tell a goals what your friends are. Write it down on your board. Speak out loud the thing that it is you’re trying to accomplish.”

  • "I find I have more willpower when I talk with other people in a similar situation. Knowing I'm not alone in my struggles really helps me."

  • "Working with creative people helps me focus."

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Find Your Why

  • "Find your purpose. It's hard to have willpower without a solid purpose."

  • "I think of my daughter. I want to show her that we can do anything we want, as long as we put in the work, even if it's hard."

  • "I can focus when it is something I am passionate about. Passion drives results!"

  • "Faith and love keep me going!"

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  • "Put off short term fun for long term gain."

  • "Limit distractions. Picture your focus as sharp as a laser beam."

  • "Take 'should' out of the equation. Remove the guilt and you give yourself a lot more freedom."

  • "Come alive in challenging situations. Let the pressure ignite your power. Being under pressure can actually be a positive thing if you learn to harness and cultivate that energy." "Written reminders around my house and alarms on my phone help me stay on track on a daily basis."

Just Get Started

  • “It’s a whole lot harder to get something started than to keep it rolling. Getting started is the key.”

  • "Willpower is all about habits. What small steps are you taking? Break your goal down into a step so small that you have no excuses not to do it."

  • "Set a morning mantra. Mine is: stay humble, stay kind, stay energized."

Also ;)

  • “Cold showers. Just sayin’.”

  • "I reward myself with cookies and that's a good incentive."

  • "I have no willpower. At all. I just force myself to do shit."

A big thank you to all the friends, colleagues and inspiring folks who contributed to this post! I love you guys. Such great advice here that I’ll definitely be returning to ;)