What are your favorite ways to feel sexy?
Today on Alive in the Fire, let's talk about ways to boost your confidence and awaken your sensual, sultry side...
Let's be honest. We all go through periods of feeling unattractive, or of doubting ourselves. Whether you're single and lacking the self-assurance to put yourself out there, or you're in a relationship but feel like you're missing a spark with your partner, this post is for you.
I know I've gone through times in my life when I feel like I'm in a slump, or I notice my second chakra energy is off. This can mean my libido is low, my creativity is limited, or I feel a lack of passion and zest for life in general.
Here are some ideas for how to accept and move through these periods in life, and to put some excitement into your next date night. Keep in mind you could also use these for 'going out to the bar with my single friends' night, too! ;)
1. Shop for something new that makes you feel sexy. Recently I discovered Tobi, an awesome website with a great selection of date-worthy outfit options. The dresses are even organized into different categories like cocktail dresses and little black dresses! I got this flirty cross back skater dress (love the wine color) and flattering black maxi dress (it's actually super comfortable).
I love that both of these dresses are a little sexier than what I'd normally buy... having a low-cut neckline or a seductive fit goes a long way toward feeling like I'm on a special date, and puts me in the mood way more than jeans and a t-shirt.
I also bought a few fun bralettes, including a lacy one and one I could even wear for yoga. Even if I was going to wear jeans and a t-shirt to dinner, having something sexy on underneath can make for a fun surprise later in the evening.
2. Have a glass of wine when you get home. Take a moment to unwind from your busy day and enjoy a little "me" time. Give yourself a chance to check in with how you're feeling before you share your energy.
Are there any emotions you need to process? Anything from your day that you need to let go of before you can enjoy date night? If you wanted, you could even spend a few moments journaling before you get ready.
3. Another fun option is to meet at the restaurant. I learned this idea from lifestyle blogger Joanna Goddard of A Cup of Jo, in her post on tips to keep the sparks flying.
It's a genius idea: instead of getting ready together at home, where you're likely to encounter buzz-kill scenarios like kids interrupting, your partner farting near you, or a reminder of the bills you haven't paid sitting on the counter... you can meet at the restaurant, inviting a romantic vibe for the evening. There's something a little thrilling about opening the door to the restaurant and spotting your lover across the room before you walk over to give them a kiss and say hello.
4. Candles and roses before dinner. Light the candles and sprinkle the rose petals ... before you even get changed for your date. See where that leads you...
There's something totally freeing about having sex before you go out, plus there's no pressure at the end of the night after you're full and have maybe had a few too many drinks. Plus, the date itself feels a little extra smiley and you get to enjoy the afterglow. What do you think, would you ever try this? Have you tried it? ;)
5. Do some yoga and deep breathing, and enjoy a relaxing, loving massage. If being in the bedroom has you feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, or just a little bit anxious... slow things down. Connect with your breath first. Stretch and move your body in a way that feels nourishing.
Rolling out your mat and spending a few minutes on it can help you open up your energy channels in a way that will benefit both you and your partner. Better yet, share this experience together.
If you're not feeling very sensual, simply make time to sit or lay down together and breathe. Give back massages or foot massages. See if something shifts for you. If it does, great; if it doesn't, great. Give yourself permission to be in the moment without forcing anything.
What are your favorite ways to get in the mood for a sexy date night? I'd love to hear!